The way people can be

It was hot october afternoon. Sultry and sleepy. She tried to concentrate on what she was studying. Her mother was resting for some time. a smallest of "siesta" after which she would get up and continue with the work. just then the bell rang. She opened the door. Postman was outside. they had some post. the postman demended money. at that time she noticed that the envelope had no stamp.She paid the money and opened the envelope. it was her photo and "patrika/janma kundali" returned. She smiled. she was used to that. Just then her mother got up and asked her. after she narrated ...her mother was thoughtful. "whoops these people dont want to pay even for the post???...that too 10 bucks? what attitude". she consoled her mom. but this is what set her wondering why do such things happen. there are times when people want to chnge her. in terms of way she dresses up or the time where her food habits are questioned. this is one more experience. of how people can be...not having even the decency of paying the postage :):) good...its really an experience.."one of its kind" saying this she got back to her studying.

Day of full fledged grilling

The cough was unbearable..and so was the nose ready to run a marathon...almost making her rethink on her decision on attending the wedding. But she couldnt...it was her very good friend who was getting married who wouldnt mind if she would not turn up..but she had to, coz she wanted nothing to dampen his big day :):) {murga/murgi halal hone ka din..after 3 days of marination called"HALDI"and guess what this day is celebrated...buu:(:( }
The three friends met at the macdonalds and set to go...the wedding place was very near...she was glad. she for a change (according to her friend) was quiet...and after a bit of photoshooting and talking with friends ...drinking water...and eating a nameless starter wondered what to do next...her another friend was deep in conversation and she wouldnt have like to disturb her....her eyes wandered and she saw him. dressed in a brown coat, he looked really like "halal murga" lines of weariness etched even as he smiled. she wondered if his face ached doing that...she felt bad for him. she knew what he went through since at her sister's wedding some years back...when one had to hide the weariness and smile...greeting the guests...she wondered if he would remember if he remembered half the guests his wife introduced and vice versa. she let out a deep breath...she was bored actually ...she was never fond of these occasions...they gave her hives...she glanced at him...and he gave her a million dollar smile...not that of weariness...but a genuine happy one...and for the first time in the evening she was glad that she was there...
Just then the lights went....wondering if the dinner would be a candle light affair...and like they had gone...they came back...she had already started to think about dinner
Ater having a nice dinner they all set back to go home...but the day bieng dassera...there was durga visarjan...all the people looked at the procession wearily...wondering at the traffic...but she was facinated...the idol was beautiful....and she felt like singing inspite of her horribly hoarse voice..."wheres the party tonight..."

One evening @ home

Oh it was really great when it was noticed. Incidently coming home very early on that day, mom was out and dad napping. idly flicking television.A bit boring, wondering a better way to end such a beautiful evening. perhaps movie with a friend or beloved :):)

Beloved was no where in sight and friends buzy...the day was slowly giving way to night...and it was just most amazing...that part of the day...the dusk. bringing out wierd feelings in the mind...bieng a bit sad a pain in the heart...and at that time you notice...standing in the balcony...that the world is preparing for night...slowly the street lights take place of fading sun...the hall becomes dimmer and dimmer...birds flying to their nests and bats coming out:):) the evening air cool a bit opposite to mumbai's hot and humid climate. Fresh cool breeze...and a cup of chai warming the hands...the vapor and warmness making you give a whimsical smile....what more can one ask for. Nothing extraordinary was needed to make the evening special...coz it had already become one...

What can be better than???

What is better than...
A pizza eaten with a close friend
A chilled "kokum" juice on a real hot day
Ice-cream impulse when on a diet...
talking on the phone late at night when every things dark with a close friend
gossiping and describing the day in the dark with mom
Hot vada...hot chai and hot gossip
party with closest friends
meeting closest pals after a real long time
unexpected visit of a nephew
kishore kumar and kenny G
gentle whispers of a song put up on a radio at a distance
unexpected compliment
unexpected good news
a bite into sinfully rich dark chocolate
walk in early in the morning
Feeling of cool breeze in rickshaw speeding to your destination late at night
Hearing your favourate song suddenly on the radio
hearing sad songs ...teary eyed and then smiling at something read as message
having your boss as your friend
savouring a bag of your favourate flavor of chips
Drops of rain on the face
walk in moonlight
a market place in diwali night
firecrackers bursting in diwali
a wish ....when becomes a reality
seeing babies and puppies and kitties
seeing the cute miniature (child) of your friend
saturday morning nothing to do...3 great books to read...some peanuts...and an indecision as to where to start...

Writing the Blog :):):)

Another song description

I liked the song Kal ho na ho...esp the sad version...the first part of this is the typical..."tum bhi chup ho...main bhi chup hoon..."real teary. but it was the second part that I liked the best...a bit philosophical but soemthing that pulls you out of the dregs of sadness contrary to the first part...go through the lyrics that I managed to type and some where you will agree :)

sach yeh hain ki dil toh dukha hain
humne magar socha hain
dil ko hain ghum kyon?
aaakh hain num kyon?
hona hi tha jo bhi hua hain
us baat ko jaane hi do
jiska nishan kal ho na ho

It actually pulls me out of the gloom whenever I hear it

Dark chocolate

Ok now this is the dark one I can say. the darkest of the lot. but like a rainbow, dark and light are part of life

Never before I just felt so alone
In this life never before
no one around me
just shadows and footprints
it was OK before but now it just hurts
the cold is seeping slowly inside me
eyes glistening with unshed tears
silence is music but this miusic is now just so defening that I crouch to hide from it
Its me I know that
I couldnt toughen I know that
But now I just want to die
death is the final gift I ask my self
coz I cant enjoy loneliness as before
its just killing me now

A tribute to you

(Now dont u dare call this poem sad...its very real and nice)

First I thought it would go away
that what I felt was just attraction
I laughed and chided at my self
scolded till it was unbearable telling my self
that what I thought was just so unimaginable

I tried, honestly I did
but it didnt work
I couldnt stop the feelings that I had for you,
the more I stopped the more they grew
and finally I resigned to the fate, and fell hard for you

u may call me unpractical
you may call me naive
you may call me romantic
but what I felt for you went beyond plain love even if I didnt show it,
I was amazed when even in silliest of things our tastes ran the same
U never caught my startled look, when u revealed some taste and volia I too had the same
I could see the sadness in your eyes which you hid away from the world and feel your happiness even when u wouldnt let me I could feel your pain
and wonder at your passion
but I hid all that coz I didnt want to make you feel akward or gulity

even if we were different yet so similar
U were and are my other half
like a twin or missing part
U knew me
understood me
wiped my tears and made me laugh
dissolving my anger brushing away my frowns
U were the one I always wanted in my life

but life is seldom fair and I have realized that
U are like that gift that is amazing but unachievable
my need but just so unreachable ,I can just see it but cannot caress it
U are my mirror image but seen in water
one touch would send ripples and the image would be lost forever

Adieu is all I can say now...adieu is what I have to tell you finally
even if my heart protests...but the heart will bleed and stop
perhaps scarred but time will heal those too

Confessions of a crazy mind

I wont be amazed if I am found murdered virtually next day...hey gys kya karun? I am able to post such stuff only...all rotdu :):)

its ok to be a bit more honest with my self
that I love you and saying no is just denying the plain truth
that I am jelous when you talk to any one else
and my heart still dances when I get one cursory glance from you
why I try to be as much as I can with you
Sad life is...I wonder
I am waiting for scraps that you give me,scared to expect more
Knowing that one fine day the scraps will end and I just have to be content
Its hard to face the fact, its hard to be practical, its hard to accept reality
that one fine day you will leave me
and that I have to move on
allowing one of the best things that happened to me pass me by
standing by the road weak and beaten
helpless as I watch you pass me by
Some day we both will be with some one else
U will find some one and and may be I
but to tell you frankly I will always remember you
Even if for you I was just someone for Hi bye :)

Ok folks...back to work then :):)

Uthaye jaaa

This song always evokes different and colorful sensations in mind...from the film "adalat" a black and white movie. This movie details how life of a person undergoes a shattering change by taking one wrong step one wrong decision in life. This songs brings out those feelings that can be felt only by a person who has gone through so much in life and yet suffers every minute for a single teeny weeny thoughtless action. The protagonist is played by Nargis and is sung by none other than Lata Mangeshkar. makes me rewind and rewind the real player :):)

The song is as follows:

uthaye ja unke sitam aur jiye ja...
yuh hi muskuraye ja...asu piye ja...
uthaye ja unke sitam
yeh hi mohobbat ka dastur eye dil
woh gham de tujhe et tu duae diye jaa
uthaye ja unke sitam
kabhi woh nazar jo samayi thi dil mein,
usi ek nazar ka sahara liye ja
uthaye ja....
satye zamana ...sitam haye duniya...
magar tu kisiki tamanna kiye jaa...
uthaye ja unke sitam aur jiye ja...
yuh hi muskuraye ja...asu piye ja...

"mindblowing" isnt it?

apun ka fav

All of you must be wondering why have I started to write recepies...
there are two main reasons...my love for food and a practice...either to write a book on cookery or open a resto or both...ok now I dont cook very bad...infact I do manage to make food palaptable...
what I have given below are my recepies....no copies from anywhere...that I wanted to share with you
Try one of these...or try both...they will give u success...and perhaps if u dont find something..just avoid using it...or replace it with something more tasty

ok now this is a simple cheese toast...but try sprinking pizza seasoning and some chilly flakes after using some or any cheese on the bread slice...toast it till golden brown on the tava and volia.....u have a fragrant cheese toast for breakfast. (it makes my sunday really tasty)

the next one is a bit complex...I usually use these dumplings as an accompaniement in soups...jab sunday ko saara family fish khata hain...
3 slices of bread
1 cheese cube flaked
a clove of garlic
one teeny weeny onion
a slice of ginger
a handful or less of coriander
salt to taste

roughly shread all the ingredients (excluding cheese) and crumb/ mince them fine in the oven
remove the mix
divide the mix equally in six parts
divide cheese into six parts
mould each part into small paari
fill it with cheese and close
roast all of them (without an ounce of oil) till there is a golden brown hue on both the sides of the dumplings
Voila they are ready
You can use them as dumplings by adding them before serving the soup

My personal preference:

• they taste amazing straight out of the tava. a bit hard bready crust and moist fragrant bread...and its heaven when u bite right inside to get the hot melted cheese..
• Hot with chilly garlic or equally fiery schezwan sauce...as a cocktail snack or starter

Afterall this decision is left to you...if the dumplings stay for that long in the first place

Chillies etc

"Kya baat hain..." was the first reaction when I tasted this fiery concotation. I am an eternal lover of spices...nope not cloves and cinnamom but chillies both green and red ones.

Incidently that afternoon we had a lunch having a fiery taste...something which instead of giving me smack made my throat cough...it was a fieriness of cloves (something I am not fond of) but chillies...give me them anytime

Though a native of south america, chillies have become an eternal part of indian cuisine...can one imagine pao bhaji or fiery avakai without chillies?

It seems there are almost 300 varieties of chillies...most of them natives of mexico...ola...damn drooling...pasilla or ancho chillies to name a few and imagine tasting bland dominos without jalapenos... then there are many of mexican dishes including nachos...with that combo of chillies and tomatoes...or thai curry with birds eye chilly

there is paprika which is used mostly used in europe to give an xta zing to a bland cuisine

Magar hum bhi kuch kam nahin...we do have our own share too...there is laungi mirchi of kolhapur or the guntur of andhra pradesh...and a colorful but tasteless kashmiri chilly...then there are capsicums or "shimla mirchi" used for stuffing

my mouth is watering already...and before I form a pool here...let me go and have one more smack of "kolhapuri thecha"

Thanks ndtv

"cho chweet" was my my first reaction when I saw her from at a distance..the most preety girl...or should I say baby...
my friend and I rushed to the hospital...when we understood that one of my friends had just become a father...I couldnt imagine...my friend who is still a kiddo...(though I admit that I am worse than him) having a baby girl...his deeply dimpled smile was simply out of the world and so was his love and respect for his wife...who is a fantastic person herself...

The experiences of my friend's wife (who also stole my heart the first time I met her by her talkative nature..."just like me" I thought) were amazing...

I didnt talk much (as I had cough...haha)...but loved it...coz these were the people who shared with me their precious happiness...

agar main kahoon..........

I came across some comments accidentally when I was making my new account for the blog…since the old one was in the process of getting defunct…

As you all very well know that I don’t leave you the comments to be posted ( ha-ha…I deactivate that option:))…but incidentally it was for this one block that I managed to get two comments…one of them was an advice and the other one seemed to be a bit typical answer to the comment…

This article spoke of my true sentiments at that particular time…and the advice was what which told me to do the obvious…but a very heartfelt and right one…however it was the other comment which pained me (good I don’t access that blog any more)

Love and death are two guests are uninvited …worse…love is one such thing that never announces its commencement…it just happens…and before u realize u are in the middle of it...

I am not a cynic but perhaps seen it all...experiences from the friends who have gone through it…and what I believe that its not for sensitive people…you should have the attitude of “chalta hain…aur koi milega”…the biggest hurt in any relationship is rejection and love is no exception…

I know I know…many of you must be on the verge of argument that…the feeling is good, that nothing is wrong in it…but hang on guys…it isnt something that I would like any one of you to go through this pain…not even my enemies…it sucks…the world appears to be dark and colorless…and at times you feel that you are going mad…

I also admit that the feeling when it starts is just so amazing…u are on seventh cloud …but then slowly all those black emotions come out. Right out of the Pandora’s Box…and you are left helpless…this is what makes me wonder..."ajab hain ishq hain yaara...pal do pal ki khushiyan..."

And if the feeling is returned it’s amazing…but if its not…you wonder…why you :):):)…
This is why I somewhere understood the depth of the song “Tanhayee….”

But this stage passes too and you come in that state where the hurt is not raw…but still pulsating….you feel numb…insensitive…as if drunk…u just want to stay alone…Tears are ur freinds...who come uninvited anytime...any moment...

U wonder and re wonder...."sau dard hain...sau rahatein...sab mila dilnasheen ...ek tu hi nahin..."
It depends on you how fast you come out of it…or do you come out of it in the first place??? I guess you just compromise…after what is life for?
If any one of you have already fallen in love and hurt…u will somewhere agree with me…for those who have not…sorry for disappointment …in the end what I would like to say that… “Be brave ”

Entry from perfection to reality

The treat was a success….lots of photos ,laughs jokes and eat …smoke and fermented smell of the warm…or say hard drinks… are bringing lift to otherwise always wilted mood. There were mood swings and some or maybe lot of dwelling in the past…trying to create something out of nothing….the knowledge that some things were just vain…that one had to move ahead …a high time …needed some reason to do that…the life was getting ruined by keeping this perpetual sadness and coldness in the heart…months passed and still the mental state was the same …the cold had seeped in to the very being…making the alienation to the world almost perpetual…a barrier from taking what life had otherwise to offer…and just when one thinks that one has had…conquered the loneliness…one wave just destroys whatever was built…making the efforts to be indifferent…to get out seem so vain….it was never known that she was that weak built…she had better constitution and better resistance…she was proud that she could handle things the meanest of them in a real efficient manner…but this was one time when she failed miserably…it was the will to get out that made her suffer more…she shook her head mentally and tried to concentrate on what her colleague was saying…and gave a laugh…for the hec of it??? She let out a deep breath…she was never pretentious…and look what she had become…a perfect actress…mentally she cheered herself…”welcome to the world of masks”