Isekai Isekaya

Just like atashinchi, one of my favourites. Thanks to the subtitles. You go to some other world as you see. The way the food is prepared, the expressions...all classy..this was my go to when we had summer off...never know, if I finish my books, i will surely go back to this one...

The kamogawa food detectives

As I reached the end of this simply written/ translated but deeply sensitive and absolutely salivating book...I searched and repaired my amazon india account and added it in my cart. A paperback will surely be lighter than hardback. I love food memories and more than having an emotional aspect that I can read only once (another half opened book but I wont buy "the girl with a knife) I love and adore food memories ( The apprentice: my life in the kitchen) or emotions if any are written wittily (sweet life in paris) or downright ribtickling funny (bongmom cookbook). I came across this title when I was searching for similar books like Relish by Lucy Knisley (which I have a copy of)I set claim in my library ( which I do before I buy...easier that way than wasting money for a one time read and donating to the library) and promptly forgot about. Then I put the claim again and went to pick it up this tuesday. Its thursday and I am already on my last chapter. And thinking of buying it. Then came the crux. Usually ebay sells me stuff for maximum of 5 dollars (I like second hand and dont mind salvaging a well read book than a new one) but both on ammajan (read amazon) and ebay were competing, its 13$ for a book. Definitely three times of what I expected but then I came across Deepika Amin (doordarshan heroine, now doing maa roles)post recommending this book and that set me thinking...The book is available for 500 rs on ammajan india...so next time the courier will have my books...I am now on library website for another book...the restaurant of lost recipes by same author... Some books just have a knack of bringing back lost love (reading books in this case) for you...nothing can be a beautiful slow finish to a well deserved break...guess girl with knife will be disarmed next

Fall break

With Diwali behind us (maybe filling our derriere), I am smack in the middle of fall break of a week. I guess Diwali holds more allure for me in preparation. cleaning the house, fixing the lights, making specials, hearing fireworks, distributing goodies...This year were many dampners. Due to extremely dry air, no diyas outside. Halloween candy stampede and dry wind made sure my rangoli looked wore zombie than diwali. The yellows and greens combined to make lime and blue sang "ami je tomar" (ref: Bhoolbhulaiya movie). But OK. The break was good. Though not much changed except getting up 2.5 hours later than godforsaken hour I get up (blame it on baba ramdev...I mean yoga and later cook and clean before I go marathonning..I mean school). Pilla and I go for two walks. He suffers endlessly with writing exercises and like. And I fell in love with another author, who needs a seperate post. I read as much as I can and soak. My color book stares at me expectantly and my eyes wander on it as well..saying soon. Once school starts, with no lux to read and get lost (not that often, due to conditions applied, I am not able to finish book in one setting), my coloring will be my only ally. Meanwhile I enjoy...with 4 more days to go. My sleep recovered. I am in neural mood. The black has turned grey...But I cherish every single moment. The grey will never turn white but within no time it changes to black hole that sucks me right in. This vacay is lovely respite...a lovely in between..

A final relaxing day before work tomorrow

More than a week and half of pain, anxiety and thoughts darker than the night." maan chinte, vairi na chinte" (the mind thinks the worse). Just when I lost hopes, I got the green signal of go, with visa approval of 3 more years. The only day when I am not anxious, when I dont cry suddenly. I know grey cloud still lurks but I have a few things to remind me that all is not bad. I may not be able to write frequently but I will try to my friend as no one except you hears the mental explosions of mind.

Almost a month into the school and 4 weeks for your friend to die on you forever.

A real depressing clody sunday, you listen to Taarak mehta downstairs as you wonder when did you lose interest in communal TV (long ago), communal dining (long long ago). The robust signs of fall become an eyesore. Dry leaves scatter on the grass as you can slowly see other house accross the street. You wonder at the last remaining weeks at SnS and will you be able to finish them. your work permit renewal receipt is not yet out and you wonder if it will be before end of coming week. Its only a short 2.5 day week. A two well deserved holidays and navratri starting. Just like that 4 weeks will get over and SnS will go on the path of no return. It hurts to the gills . I wont be able to meet my usual clan then. The usual customers are already scattered, going to other stores to complete groceries. I absolutely saw only two of my regulars this week. One of the reasons why I continued working in SnS last year inspite of hectic school work is because I missed my regulars. I will never meet Chip, Revati, Christine, Jackie and Dana...Life still goes on....just like I think "last year at this time"...I hope I will think about SnS this way next year, hopefully without hurt and regrets, glad to be with the store till its life ended.

The last day of vacation : labor day

I was wondering for a long time and which is so much like me, planning my last day of leisure. It wont be leisure I know because many others will be involved and cooking and entertaining them will be involved but still inspite of one side of me said just go with the flow. Dont go for a walk, sleep till late (when have I ever?), I know that whenever I have decided that, just feel I have lost so much time doing nothing and the time IK want for my self just disappeared and came in form of that corner piece of ice that didnt melt, an eyesore but when I start the day, way I usually do, with just stretching the bliss as no clock is saying to me to keep things ready, I am good. I got up half an hour late that usual 4.00 am, finished my yoga and decided to start my walk in a little dark. There is a kind of differentness in the usual 5.30 am walk and one over the sunday or holiday. The air is quieter, a bit more leisure, an awareness of everyone asleep, very few lights in homes, very few or neglilible vehicles on road. You hear the day waking up with bird calls, the rustling of intermittent cool breeze, an indicator of fall, the roads are quieter even when you start your walk back...the down hill road to SnS, normally a bit "car-ry" at the time you turn to your home is pleasently empty. You come home to see that the bird feeder is almost empty and your tea nearly evaporated. Nevertheless,, you dont let it dampen your mood and taking that tea, and listening to bhajans, you fill the bird feeder, enough for your beauties but not for the bullies (they have still not endeared to you), finishing the evaporated tea, to an absolute bubble of tranquility, you decide to have a small nap when you can still have it. wondering if the bubble will still be there or bubble of landmovers, cars and human noises will take over (which have now a days started to overwhelm you). Unexpectedly you get up rested (you really didnt expect to nap just opening a box of memories and tossing), you got up snoozing the alarm and then got up to thankfully nicely brewed tea. Taking a handful of peanuts in shell in your favourite red teeny dabba (a reminder of india as it came from there and of the kinds that you as a kid used...eons ago). Your cuties scatter away from bird feeder, as you sit with your poison (tea and peanuts) and listen to the remaining playlist. You sit still and cuties are back. You see someone craning its neck and then flying off, returning again and scampering back. You wonder if that scaredy chipmunk will come near you and you can share peanuts...but it says no thankyou as it goes to the manless apartment in front of you. The phone is singing "uthi uthi ba..." You start your 1 1/2 tea. You see a robin peeping at you through a bush and then decides bird feeder if not for him if you are around. You sigh but deide to cut it some slack. You are happy that inspite of sun coming up so high, the bubble of silence has not been destroyed, except an occasional car, a railway bogey and somewhere very far a landmowever going around. Your tea is almost done and so is "eka janardhani charan"...one more song and you ddecide to go in. Peace that is so rare for you, you want to enjoy it to the fullest. You dont need stylish patio chairs, a bare step is enpugh. "amrit sabhi mein baat k" your favourite stanza starts and almost happy and satisfied you collect your stuff...a whole day ahead of you.

A bird feeder

I love birds. Then come cats and maybe pugs..but birds come first. I love to imagine how lord Brahma decided to unleash his creativity when he decided to make birds. I had a book in india describing about habitats of birds locally found. There is our national bird peacock. Ohh so elegant and beautiful. Both white and the multicolored, lord Krishna's favourite. There is the demure sparrows and meanacing crows and ravens. Annoying but somewhat pleasant pigeons. Then there are mynas and cuckoos, parrots which when not imprisoned in the cell, have regal long green plumage. Then there are storks, once in a while kingfishers. But it was in New Jersey that I got to see the real art. Plsticky blue and white blue jays , black starlings, black and yellow gold finches, the dirt brown and solmn mourning dove. Then there were robins and cardinals with their striking red plumage and the usual suspects of sparrows (who are my favourites ) and crows (nope...still didnt endear) Egret (bigger storks) vultures, a wierd but ok addition (didnt see from near but they are around . Especially when a deer fell due to car). Cranky ganders and preety ducks...so many others that I saw but forgot to search. Marvelling in their beauty. Finally I had a bird feeder and took almost three weeks to install it. and then for two days it sat lonesome, and then yesterday I saw a lady cardinal and many cutie sparrows...A kind satisfaction. Now hope to hear them so much that it becomes daily occurance...marvelling at god's talent in making so many different kinds of lives.

Sands of time

The days leading to last day of school in 2024 for the year 2023-24, went in a jiffy. Kind of just dragging time. June switched to july for ESY and then that got over too. When I saw the calender on the last day of ESY, I remember thinking..ohhh, except for weekends when I will go to SnS , I have 22 days for my self. But as I say for my self, I know thats not true. 22 days of working extra with pilla. Keeping his skills relevant and maintained and thats how my vacation went as I stand on the noon of last tuesday of vacation as next week, our week will start two days earlier than pilla. My mornings mostly started with a walk to library, two days of late time and whole clock crumbled, so I started going when the day just started. I liked how the light shifted, I also noticed how my usual time to leave started getting darker and darker, till it was barely lighted when I left. I had to wear a hoodie now and the marigolds that bloomed frenzy just a few days back, started reducing their crop and the crop already there, lost its lustre.The amount of birds I heard and saw in the morning dropped dramatically and the leaves turned that shade of green, before which it will slowly turn colors. Yes fall was coming with slow but steady feet. After I came back home, I used to think of taking a nap before starting to cook and get ready for the day but that never happened, so then I started taking my cuppa and sitting out in the patio to enjoy tranquility while listening to my favourite bhajans. I noticed how much sound activity increased in 1/2 hour of me coming back home. Yes, humans are truly noisiest creatures, what with vehicles vrooming and planes whooshing. Then I would go back home after my first cuppa was done , either put second cuppa or make breakfast and keep it ready for the boys. Then pilla's studies would start to maintain his skills, and within no time my day's morning would finish, sometimes at 11.30 am, sometimes at 12.00 pm. A nap here and there, mr Lee coming and evening would smile upon me. Where did the day go? Where did my morning go? my afternoon??, recently Amit started joining us to the park and meanwhile we came back, the street lights were on...yes, day had become 1/2 hour shorter. That 1/2 hour would be spent drinking cool sparkling water, hints of days holding on tight. Now the days just run off and within no time its wednesday. Then I know the week is gone. Thursday gives me melancholy now than the excitement of school days. Now weekend means another week lost, as time flies by. I got time for my self, nothing unusual. No coloring, no crafting. I shrug my shoulders at the thought. Next week, my vacation would have already ended. somewhere wondering how long my work permit will take to come, I wonder...as I see the afternoon sun from the usual study table, I shrug.. leave everything to my god. I am sure he has best for me in his mind. my mind clears and as I decide to publish this entry, a half smile forms on my face.

An end to a beautiful start

I started working in stop and shop when we shifted. It was my second choice the first one bieng shoprite as I was learning to be in florals there. But they could'nt give me more than 12 hours a week and which meant only thrice a week, almost part time of part time. I was irritated because more than 1/2 the time I was home, this prompted me to apply in SnS and my remaining of the time got filled. It was then that I got the kick of doing two jobs, a kick that I am enjoying till this day. And the work permit got over. Then I got in the Y and applied back in SnS but no reply came back. One day, I had gone to buy something when I met my mentor/pal and she told me to reapply and I did. Once again working over the weekends. Later, I got really tired of Y and applied in school district, I thought I could discontinue but I couldnt, I loved the customer interaction, I loved meeting people and in the process made friends both in customers and associates. I would sometimes wish a stray saturday or sunday off but once I would reach the store, time would pass in a jiffy, I would wait for my favourite customers and the jokes we shared. I liked the walks to the store when the sun was just rising. And now this pal was closing. In four months and I wonder. Somewhere it would be a logical end to a lovely relationship with no temptation to go back. Though better (?) is coercing me to leave as soon as possible, I wish I can hold on atleast till october. It feels as if I will be losing a dear friend to a deadly disease but hope so I can stay with her till she dies a natural death in november.

Mango after real long time

I love mangos. Its so muchmore than once upon a time love for chocolate. I love a mango arizona, a mango poptart a mango talenti icecream, a mango coconut noka smoothie. Some were hits like arizona and talenti but others were misses. Noka is eaten chilled especially after a hot walk from school. And then my bestie who knows and shares my love for mangoes brought me three fragrant specemins as a way to enjoy them as season fruit. Mangoes are really hard to find good in US so I was especially sceptical but I had to try them . so today I sliced open one and ate the slice just near the sink. I plan to peel and store remaining and eat either with pilla or if he is not keen (which I doubt, the guy shares almost equal love for fruits as I do) I will cut and reserve for tomorrow afternoon. Sometimes in rush of life and taking care of others needs, we tend to forget what we like and sometimes even what we love ( in my case mangoes, lychees....list goes on) and it takes someone who really loves you to bring that thing to you. As I come back, eating a slice and later the flesh around the seed, face smeared with mango that I washed, I feel good after a real long time I found a food that filled my heart. I have two more remaining to enjoy. Thanks S.

Memorial Day holiday

A day that started nice and windy, a bit cold but post lunch it rained and drained. For a change I didnt sit with pilla for studying, I completed all the manga// cartoon books on food (there was not much any ways) and later finished "crying at Hmart" by Michelle Zauner. A straightforward and poignant story about a mother and daughter. Not too much elaboration and melodrama as it unfolds. just plain feelings that you can relate to. As the day changes to night, I am atleast happy that I finished this book and though gut renovation and a magazine beg for my attention...maybe later...may vacation is coming up.

Here I am on last day of spring break

Here I am on the last day of spring break. Its morning, the little bit of sunny-cloudy morning. Had my second cup of tea. The house and the neighboring ones are quiet. People enjoying the saturday slumber. I work tomorrow. I love working and thats what made me decide to work seven days a week. There are many reasons but this is main and best reason. I had decided so much this break. a little bit of reading ...a little bit of craft, writing, drawing...stitching. But honestly none of this happened. the Shel Silverstein stayed near the bedside, like it stayed on sunday night...So yes, dear friend I am happy to be back. Holidays are exciting till they are in future but actual holidays are just one day melding to another, just a late wake up alarm, everything else stays the same.

A sunny afternoon slowly changing to evening

Today we didnt go anywhere. I was not in a mood to spend unnecessarily by just going out for the hec of it. And since we had been for Siddhant's painting workshop yesterday, today we decided to stay put. Shubs came just after I came back to work and after she left, I had an afternoon nap where as usual and what happens even in the morning, I got up before alarm. I had a quiet lunch of dosa and chutney with a book for company while better (?) half and pilla rested. I finished the second of 2 oui caramel dessert. Then the guys had lunch. I was in no mood to put on tv for pilla who had two choices . Either work or improvise.I finished three more pages of coloring big drawings (wierd as well), saw disinterestedly youtube for a while , while my tea boiled which I had with some garlic parmesean pita chips. I watered the succelents and dusted the thin film of dust on many things downstairs. I broomed whole of first floor (pending...but feels so clean now), folding laundry, prepping pilla's monday clothes, had a bath and donned my constant company "rudraksha" had a bitterish new coffee that better (?) half made. Now I will be clearing the study table and the dinner will come from chipotle. The lovely sun shines at me as I thank my almighty for a beautiful leisure second half of the day, wondering what to prep up next (read pilla's lunches), cleaning my god's small home and light a diya. work on duolingo... As the evening turns into a beautiful dusk, I am happy I accomplished all of it, as I type this, Pilla and better (?) half are gorging the veggie bowl and I take a deep breath as I listen to the cartoon...life is definitely perfect for me...I am mentally thinking of one last task of listing calling various doctors and dentists for appointments as I see a car parked in front of half dark home in front of me....ohh thats a doordash or something similar...I listen to Tarak Mehta now...I see a street light switched on as i smile a little sad but mostly happy. Today was a much better day...grey but a shade lighter than normal...a day that I still feel I have enough left...

A grey sky, rains and malalaise today

Thats the reason I work on weekends. The third word always hangs low on my neck...ready to cast a perpetual black cloud around me.

A sick day that just started

Today I called in sick. A rare thing to do and hence really wierd and guilty as well. I had such wierd state of mind that I messaged my better(?) half if I should take a leave. "go ahead. You need to". Was his instant reply. As I work 7 days a week, except for school holidays, I dont get any. So while I started this post at 8.00 am, chores and errands made me sit back at 10.00 am. Yes, the day is still long. 4 hours long. 4 hours to sweep out negetivity, 4 hours to bring in productivity and usefulness. $ hours to count my blessings, 4 hours to pray for peace. I work in a good place now. Of course there is headache and politics but I can shut it out most of the times. But recently I noticed that my mind has tied it self against these "trojans" so tight that my whole hard drive of a brain is tired, ready to shut down. Plans are many. To read , to draw, to color, to organize, to sleep and ofcourse netflix but that will come very late. There is a plan to eat out with better (?) half. so many plans. But will they fit in 4 hours? Only time will tell...

Unexpected , short but happy break

Today we have off from school due to forcast of excess rains. For a change got up a little late, freshened with yoga, bhajans and chai, then spoke to a pal (read MIL) after long time, cooked, taught and now writing some more. Its already dark outside even if its just 5.47 PM. I miss summer's harsh sun at this time but its good.Its the first year that I am not liking this early day end. I guess maybe because the last summer we went for daily walks to the park. We found time to do grocery shopping than just lolling in bed. I enjoyed early day end in my earlier place, where I had a beautiful window at the access road side where I could see people walking by, cars passing, seasons change from spring (pollen rich sneeze inducing white flowers and later delicate shiny green bud like leaves), summers ( of dusty leaves and occasional showers) fall ( leaves deciding to commit collective harakiri) and winter ( naked trees anyone?). I enjoyed my breakfast, cuppas and reading there. I cold winter be damned but I would sit at the window marvelling soft gauzy snow flakes falling. I do miss that home sometimes that was smaller but easily cleaned, A big, lighted kitchen, a balcony overseeing a small stream where I would do visarjan. I learned and recognized many birds there...and so on... But its OK, change is good...I like now as well, where I have my own way of talking my way, which was not possible earlier. I can upload my writeups more, where I read them only myself but I like to put them somewhere, like an online diary. I have job(s) which are walking distance and are satisfying but I work 7 days a week and the day I get a holiday is a rare but almost lickable treat. One of the things I had decided this year again and hope to continue is stop procrastination. My next mission is making a quilt out of rags and quarters I have. maybe it will get ready till next winter. Who knows what will happen next year but I am sure I will fight to make it better than last year definitely. Now that the rambling needs to be shut off...time to hibernate the lappie and go back to real world.

Life beyond atashinchi

I had started watching a cartoon japanese manga on youtube called atashinchi. It was and is still my favourite and a company when I get tired of watching anything or studying on duolingo. I have liked and still like cartoons. The old disney and tom and jerry are still my favourites but all I can still think of starting to watch are little lulu show and garfield and friends. These were the shows that kept me company when I was in college and down with a bout of jaundice, eating a badly prepared bhakri and pithle ( by yours truly ) luckily these were and still my favourite a quick and nutritious fix but not that quick for after school before pilla comes back food unfortunately but that is a different story. As I sit today, typing this, a cancelled school and flurries flying merrily, I think of these two shows, which I will surely watch if I get around them. Today is a big day indeed, even with Pilla's studies and cooking .Cross fingers...no procrastination. ;p

A lull and a buzz

As I sat in vajrasan, listening to pt. Bheemsen joshi and closed my eyes . The first thought came in my mind was the lull and buzz in aai's place in mumbai. Now why mumbai and why not Jsrpur (not stayed enough) or US (no lull and buzz visible where I live). I have always loved windows. Even now as I type, I can see the streetlight casting a golden glow on otherwise muddy snow. But this place is very private and except some resident's cars, I see nothing, even if I sit here for hours together. But not at aai's current location. Just second building from a busy road, its always buzzing, sometimes like a honeycomb nearby. Ok I am digressing. So here is how it starts. While a tiny bit of activity is on throughout the night (though mumbai is a city that never sleeps and gurgling never ends...sometimes I wonder where the sole person I saw walking is going...or where is the rickshaw filled with a family is going at 2.30 am...yes I was awake then blame it on jetlag). So the place starts getting up say by 4.00 am when a truck comes to deliver milk crates. There is a thriving milk business which receives its daily fare to sell. No shop or rather near a closed shop, under a big tree, the crates are deposited and the truck goes off. Slowly the lady and her spouse (?) comes and then starts the distribution.Meanwhile the BEST buses start with a few people in it, few early hard working people.Meanwhile the business winds up, which is say by 6.30 am, the buzz has started already. fresh breads and wares are carried by bikes (or read cycles) to sell or transport to neaby stores. By 6.45, am the street light switches off and a day starts. Kids rush to schools and school bues, people rush to catch bus to offices or as intermittent transport on way to work. Slowly sun greets and now the shops open, more office and school buzz. Meanwhile that gets over say by 8.30 am, the buzz of shops opening, vegetable vendors preparing their wares, home makers on way to fresh vegetables start. Now the whole lane is buzzing. So much that there are honkings and jams and people meeting and talking on roads, . The buzz becomes slower when sun is the harshest. Say between 1.00 PM to 3.30 or 4.00 pm. The vegetables get their cover from piercing sun. The morning vendors or sellers, done selling and on their way home, the vening chat and snack vendors getting ready with their wares to entice college mates laughing way home, people from office trudging their way home, home makers shopping and deciding either a snack or parcelling for home. evening veggie vendors getting ready with wares. The 'nightmarish buzz' starts from say 5.30 pm and lasts till 9.00 pm. The dings of BEST buses full of people looking like an over packed bag, the honking, the shouting, the pushing the rushing. The sizzles coming from the kitchens as they prepare the evening supper, daily soaps blaring from homes..And just like a seawave slowly melting to foamy water, this rush dies down say by 9.30 pm. The buses still have people in them but not those many. And then the lull further deepening with shops closing, frequency of transit transport lessening, the venors covering their wares and pushing their carts to their destination...and say by 12.00 am the last bus goes to its "aagar" or parking lot and with few p;rivate vehicles, life slowly takes 50 disturbed winks. Roads now breathe and if it has rained, shine the golden pearls of street lights..I maynot miss the rush, but I truly miss the thought process that went on in my mind as I sat at the window...shifting position as my legs got numb....thinking of the old night watchman as he had his self prepared dinner of rotis, bottle gourd sabji at his small single room rest area...wondering of life and waves of life as the sleep decided for one more day to elude me for more time... I really had to kind of purge these thoughts and not loose them to procrastination...Glad I did it, and as I close, tucked in a blanket, the picture that changes little as each time I see it, starts slowly forming in front of my slowly sleepy eyes...

Complaints go on.

I am no exception and no one is an exception.. Everyone loves to criticise and complain. About others, the way they make them feel. This is what had happened in the earlier place, it happened here as well. Saying things behind someone's back, enjoying that...initially it felt harmless but later I realized that I am getting decayed from inside. I was getting negative and feeling absolutely bad. But a timely quote saved my self. "As long as you have a roof over your head, clothes on your back, food on your table and those you love around you, you HAVE ALL you will ever need. Be grateful, be happy" This quote helped and helps me be grateful. Truly gratitude exercise works wonders on the soul. Just 2 minutes everyday.

A new year, a new laptop (work related) a new ( three month old ) job

I invited new year with many things. I got more and more closer to my "aradhya devat". I can say religious without sounding obsessed or pompous. I love reading and knowing things about hinduism. For me my religion is not just something for the soul but very much thought provoking. I actually wonder how one of the world's oldest religions can be so scientific, brimming with knowlege and just so logical. For the uninitiated, the religion may be a way of paganism or idol worship but for visual worshippers like me its a bliss. I am trying to learn to appreciate. At times you tend to forget what you have got in favor of what you wish for. which like a horizon, just changes... I plan to write more, now that I dont have to ask for a system...I have got my own now, and I have it available at home , especially for Sid's typing practice. Je combatte la D tous les jours. Je sais ca mais je n'ai pas le cran, parceque j'ai souvent des expreiences insensibles et mauvaises avec qui j'ai parle avant. la personne ne comprend qu'il ya avait des instances ou j'ai surivi la peine a la nuit, sans se s******... je combatte tous les jours...et mes travails essayent de le faire plusieurs fois...quelquefois je gagne mais plusieurs fois je vainquis et je pleure tout seule..mais c'est la vie et mon seul ami est mon dieu...je parle avec lui...et avec lui il n'ya pas la judegement... I hope today marks the day I can start my blog again...only for my self... expressing my self